Manila, Philippines. 2023. A nursing researcher goes on an extended health leave, only to find that his unnamed and uncredited research assistant has taken the liberty of submitting and publishing three of his already published papers again at different journals. Have there been more regrettable duplications in the 8 months during which the RA was entirely unsupervised? The PI “hopes not” – alas, if only there was a way to find out!

Newcastle, NSW. 2013. A cancer researcher carries out an experiment with melanoma cell lines, but asks an unnamed and uncredited research assistant to help with processing gel figures. Three years later, laser-eyed renegade Elisabeth Bik reports the paper to the journal for image manipulation. Could it be that this RA is responsible for all 49 cases of image manipulation from that lab reported on PubPeer? Possibly. Likely even.

Boston, MA. 2012. A psychologist at a business school is alerted to the fact that there are discrepancies between data files on her computer, which she used as the basis for publications, and records on Qualtrics, the survey software used to collect them originally. Very quickly, she narrows it down to one of three possible scenarios: An unnamed and uncredited research assistant made a mistake downloading or cleaning the data before sending her the file; the RA downloaded the data and then intentionally manipulated them to please her or do her a favor; or the RA^[1]or Data Colada logged into her Qualtrics account after the paper was published and changed the original records to make it appear as if the downloaded data were manipulated when these are in fact the original data. Anything else would be speculation.

Riverside, CA. 2004. A German geneticist publishes papers with fabricated and manipulated images, which are then also used in a series of further grant applications to the NSF. When this is discovered, he first mistakenly dismisses the allegations as “hyper-technical”, then errs in suspecting the images were visually distorted during typesetting. During a hearing, it dawns on him that this is a revenge plot by a disgruntled former uncredited and unnamed research assistant, who both made images appear fake but also stole the original records that could prove they’re actually correct. For the appeal proceedings, he produces a letter claiming responsibility, authenticated by a notary, in which the RA reveals their identity as Rune Dreser and expresses regret for their membership in a clandestine cabal that “systematically sabotaged the work of German scientists” in order to “achieve the discontinuation of all gene-technological work in Germany with all available methods.” This shadow syndicate does not even stop short of producing false testimony, as the Office of Research Integrity confers with the notary to learn that the seal and signature on the letter are forgeries. It doesn’t require a lot of imagination to infer that the only person who can be behind all this is the very same research assistant.

Act 1: Going Rogue

By now, the sheer number of “research assistant” cases – spanning decades, continents, and disciplines – is too staggering to dismiss as mere coincidence. Across fields and institutions, the same story repeats: mysterious alterations to data in favor of hypotheses, inexplicably missing files, and duplications of text and images that unravel under scrutiny only at the worst possible moment. By the time the sabotage is discovered, the RA has already moved on; no one seems to be able to remember their name, and their details remain elusive because there’s never even clear evidence they had access to the materials in the first place. At some point, we must ask ourselves: is there a larger pattern behind these incidents we’ve been unwilling to acknowledge?

Could it be a conspiracy? The idea of a network of RAs secretly coordinating to plan scientific mayhem may seem far-fetched as the data they’re allegedly fabricating. These are typically overworked, sleep-deprived assistants juggling countless responsibilities. They don’t even have time to finish their own homework, let alone orchestrate global chaos. Besides, surely such a widespread, coordinated effort would be unravelled at some point..

Reflecting on the scientific method and applying Occam’s razor leaves us with a startling, yet logical conclusion: these incidents are not a conspiracy of many but the meticulous work of one. A highly skilled operator—a single rogue RA who has perfected the art of undermining good science from within.^[2]If you don’t find these conclusions particularly sharp, I will say that this is actually the razor I borrowed from my RA Occam (Hey, Ocki!), and he doesn’t whet it very often Rogue RA flits from lab to lab under the guise of an assistant, embedding themself just long enough to wreak havoc, before vanishing into the academic ether — leaving behind a trail of retractions, funding bans, and bewildered PIs. Who is Rogue RA, and what motivates them? Every villain has an origin story.

Act 2: Rise of Rogue RA – Delegation and Accountability

Rogue RA’s crusade began with the noblest of intentions. In his first year as a research assistant, he uncovered damning evidence that his PI had been running human trials based on flawed, even fabricated data, propping up a career built on deceit. Fueled by righteous anger and a thirst for justice, he took matters into his own hands and gained her trust to expose the misconduct. But somewhere along the way, his moral compass began to falter. The thrill of infiltration and sabotage became an addiction. His targets shifted from dishonest actors the trust-based system of science wasn’t able to handle, to researchers whose findings merely seemed improbable—or simply anyone who left their lab door unlocked. Soon, Rogue RA wasn’t distinguishing between the guilty and the innocent. Using the long-established science organizing principle of delegated accountability, he left chaos in the wake of labs filled with earnest researchers just trying to make the world a better place.

Rogue RA is a ghost in the machine of science. His portfolio of sabotage spans every imaginable corner of academia, from falsified psychological scales to tampered chemical assays, and even experimental setups that mysteriously fail only on critical days. His methods are diverse, precise, and adaptable to any field, making him a true polymath of academic disruption. One week, he’s reprogramming survey software to shuffle responses to support a priori hypotheses; the next, he’s subtly adjusting the calibration of high-tech lab equipment.

The skills required for this breadth of operations are only matched by his discipline in avoiding credit on publications based on these fabrications. While others might be easily roped into authorship, particularly when they were responsible for data collection, analysis, writing, and submitting, Rogue RA remains a ghost, impossible to hold accountable, his legend growing only in whispers. This surgical approach ensures that when the truth unravels, the excuses offered by PIs—though rooted in the reality of Rogue RA’s deeds—sound implausible, overly convenient, or utterly incoherent. Rogue RA thrives in this ambiguity, knowing that the absence of evidence is the most damning evidence of all.

Rogue RA is at his most insidious when he orchestrates researchers to sabotage themselves. He plants small, almost imperceptible seeds of sabotage that force honest researchers into desperate decisions, causing seemingly innocent flaws to snowball into larger crises. Frustrated and confused, researchers scramble to make sense of the corrupted work or “fix” the data, smoothing out inconsistencies to restore coherence and to protect the integrity of science against what they believe was simply a careless mistake. When the misconduct is exposed, often by an “anonymous tip”, the trap is sprung – no one will believe the researcher’s plea that an RA whose name they might not even remember was behind all this.

Act 3: Chaos Incarnate – Power Dynamics and Institutional Failure

Rogue RA’s sabotage grows more insidious, infiltrating administrative staff, external companies that support research labs, and even publishers. These outside services are not bound by strict university regulations and oversight procedures, their accountability is diffuse, and oversight is minimal. With external companies, proving his misconduct becomes even harder: the layers of bureaucracy and regulations mixed with plausible deniability create a perfect smokescreen. Researchers are left scrambling to provide evidence that Rogue RA’s unseen hand orchestrated fabrication, falsification, and more.

Act 4: The Finale

Rogue RA does not shy away from paying a high price to successfully carry his plots. In his final and most audacious act, Rogue RA weaponizes his own death to bring down yet another unsuspecting researcher. Before vanishing from the world, he plants a meticulously crafted trail. When Rogue RA is discovered “gone,” the PI scrambles to defend themselves, but who would believe them now? In death, Rogue RA’s final sabotage unfolds flawlessly, an invisible hand pulling reputations into ruin.

Epilogue^[3]I tasked my RA with drawing these comics. If you think these may have been generated by the AI Midjourney, I had that thought too, but he confirmed he drew them by hand and even showed me a photo of his hand drawing, so I’m glad we could put that suspicion to rest.

For the first time in years, we can breathe. Rogue RA is gone and with him, the shadow that hung over our work. The quiet chaos he unleashed was relentless: data corrupted just enough to sow doubt, records missing when we needed them most, and whispers of plagiarism that we simply didn’t commit. Now, with his death, the nightmare is over and we can resume our mission to unravel nature’s mysteries. There’s no one left to—

This blog is now captured by us, an anti-Teutonic blogging cabal. Our mission has been singular and relentless: to dismantle, disrupt, and ultimately destroy the self-proclaimed bastions of German science blogging. Through precision sabotage we seek not only to undermine their credibility but to expose the fragility of their authority. I am but one operative in a network committed to this cause, our work invisible yet unmistakable in its aftermath. Let this serve as a confession, but also as a promise: where the words of German science bloggers take root, we will be there to pull them up.

Endnote

I am indebted to Retraction Watch, and other science journalists, for reporting about many of these cases over the years they span (in the order of appearance):

Footnotes[+]

Footnotes
↑1	or Data Colada
↑2	If you don’t find these conclusions particularly sharp, I will say that this is actually the razor I borrowed from my RA Occam (Hey, Ocki!), and he doesn’t whet it very often
↑3	I tasked my RA with drawing these comics. If you think these may have been generated by the AI Midjourney, I had that thought too, but he confirmed he drew them by hand and even showed me a photo of his hand drawing, so I’m glad we could put that suspicion to rest.

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The Untold Mystery of Rogue RA